Since I wrote the first piece, I’ve feel a great burden lifted. I never knew that simply expressing the grief I’ve felt all of my life would be the one thing that would help relieve that pain. I’ve worked so hard to keep those feelings buried, to carry on with life with a positive, optimistic attitude because that’s the way I want to move through this life. I don’t want to trudge around exuding sadness and negativity – I can’t see the worth in that kind of existence.
But now, having moved some of those thoughts from my head and my heart and put them down in writing – WOW! – the relief is tremendous. I feel much more able to be myself in an open and honest way instead of playing the role I’ve assigned myself. Joy is much more authentic and heart-felt and I feel I’m connecting with people on a much deeper level. It’s a very satisfying feeling. I’m beginning to crave it. Not a bad feeling, at all.
Today, I thought about a movie I saw a while back, an animated film called In and Out. It’s a nice little movie and a lot of fun, but the message it delivers is a very good one to take through life. The main characters are the emotions of a young girl who has been uprooted from her home and friends to move to a new city with her parents. Joy, the emotion who wants to stay in charge and keep everything sunny and happy for the young girl, works tirelessly to keep the other emotions at bay: Anger, Fear, and especially Sadness. Not until the end does Joy realize that all of the other emotions must have a chance to emerge when needed. Anger can produce the determination to stand up for oneself. Fear can keep one from getting involved in dangerous situations. And Sadness, when not left uncontrolled, can let others know when comforting is needed, when care needs to be taken, when uplifting words and actions are needed. In other words, expressing our sadness can be the best way to let others know we need their help. Expressing our sadness can be the best way to let ourselves know we cannot do everything on our own, that help is something others are willing to give if only we have the courage to ask.
sorrowful/empathetic/introvert 